Social Grasshopper

For one year, I disengaged from what has always been a big portion of my life - the social side.  I often referred to myself as a hermit during this time of reflection and introspection.  It was an adventure I had never attempted.  At times it felt so wrong...saying no to invitations was the hardest.  Despite the challenge of saying no, it was a therapeutic experience.  I got to know my introverted side...a part of me that I've neglected for much of my life.  It was rewarding to find fulfillment, strength and happiness from within.  As a hermit, I still went on many adventures:  hiking, kayaking, triathlons, creative retreats to Lake Waccamaw, haunted houses, running, biking, 4 weddings (not very hermitish) and much more.  Unfortunately, I did not finish the book I had planned to write.  I have been working on it though and the idea is blossoming into something I had not predicted!  Spring has not only infused colors and life into the flowers, trees and nature but it has breathed a dynamic energy into my original mission of living each day as the adventure that it is.

Now, I'm ready to let my extroverted side come out to play while still allowing quality time for introspection with my introverted side.  I want to strike a healthy balance between the two.  Before I may have been a social butterfly, but now I see myself as a social grasshopper.  :)

I have neglected my blog for quite sometime.  In the beginning, I committed to a 30 day blog challenge.  Today, I commit to blogging at least once a week indefinitely.  It is a continuation of my original mission, to stay present and live each day as the adventure it is.  Each week I'll post about exciting adventures found in daily life!  Wooohoooo!!!!!

A New Path and a Speech

I've been getting into the swing of a whole new gig for 2011.  Major decisions have been made that are taking me down a whole new path!

Big Decisions:

1. December 23, 2010:  I decided to get out of Real Estate.  This decision deserves a entire blog entry (or three), but in less words...there is something else I would like to accomplish.  Which leads us to..
2. December 31, 2010:  I've made the goal to write a book this year.  I met with my writing buddy, Beth, on this day and we put together our writing plan.  Much more to come about this!
3. March 9, 2011:  In order to keep balance in my life I've found an 8:30am - 5pm position for a company that recognizes employees for their strengths.  Not only am I in a great environment but have the means to follow my dreams (while job hunting for this position I worked as an independent contractor in advertising and mental health).
4. Along with my writing, I have been putting myself into as many speaking opportunities as I can.  Most recently is the International Speech Contest.  There are six levels to the contest.  I have advanced through two so far and will be speaking at the third level this weekend!  Here's a link to my speech that was recorded in the Area contest (the 2nd level).  Nicole's Speech

Sprinkled throughout these big decisions have been many side adventures along the way:

• met with Bobbie Staten, a nationally recognized Motivational Humorist
• three and half days of water fasting with my hubby.  Greg made it 7 days!!  He is amazing.
• many great books (Fall of Giants, Siddhartha, Confessions of an Ugly Stepsister, Philosophy for Dummies, Nonfiction Book Proposals and The Agony and The Ecstasy, A Biographical Novel of Michaelangelo) 
• visited the Buddhist Temple in Bolivia
• reveled in a fun filled girls weekend in Myrtle Beach
• met with Tom Morris "who just may be the world's happiest philosopher", author & professional speaker
• explored a Labyrinth
• did my first Adventure Race (with my brother and hubby), 
• was the Murderer at a Murder Mystery dinner party
• plenty of birthday, baby shower, engagement, and other celebrations throughout these 3 months

I realize now that blog entries need to be dedicated to many of these experiences!  Much more to come!

I promise

Dear Reader,

By the end of 2011, I promise to have written a book about how every day of our life is an adventure.  Each day holds limitless possibilities of discovery.  Every single decision we make takes us down undiscovered paths.  Our choices in each moment are creating the masterpiece that is our life.  You are a trailblazer from the moment you get out of bed.  I promise this book will help you see this in yourself.

You will be empowered.  The power does not lie in the book, it lies within you.  My words will simply serve as a  catalyst in seeing yourself as your own version of Amelia Earhart, a Goonie, Harry Potter, Jacques Cousteau, Froto Baggins, Lief Erickson, Ponce de Leon, Indiana Jones...you are navigating the most thrilling voyage there is, your own life.  In reading this book, you will be instilled with wonder in the "average day".  Actually, an average day will no longer exist.  You'll come to see how exhilarating each moment of your life is because it is you who is creating it with every move you make.  It will encourage you to switch off the auto pilot and fully experience this incredible journey you are on.  With this perspective, you hold immense power in every choice you make, your response or reaction to everything that comes your way.  These decisions have brought you to this moment right now and can take you anywhere.  Doesn't that make you feel alive?  This book will fill you with excitement for your adventure of the day.  It will help you be present.  It will invoke value into what was once mundane.  It is a reminder that we are meant to fully experience and enjoy our short existence in this world.

We are all human and there will be times that we struggle, have doubt and experience pain but I want to remind us that all these experiences (the joy, the pain, the rewards, the losses) are part of the incredible adventure that is our life.  My book will help us see that the power lies in our choices and how we respond to the many turns of our journey.  I promise to share a perspective that will fill us with wonder for every day of our life.

(This was a writing exercise that I did as the beginning phase of writing my book.  It is a letter to the future reader.)

Five Years From Now

December 21 – Future Self. Imagine yourself five years from now. What advice would you give your current self for the year ahead? I love this type of exercise.  I once threw a "Come As You Will Be in Five Years" Party.  I invited my friends to step into their future selves in appearance and with props that showed who they would be in five years.  2012 will be the five year mark of that party, and I'm very curious to look back at our goals and see how far we've come.  It was such a fun evening.  A limo picked us up and drove us around while we talked about who we had become in those five years.  The limo then pulled up to the curb of Circa 1900 with red carpet directing us into the restaurant.  There were paparazzi and fans cheering us on as we made our way up the red carpet.  While we had dinner, the mayor had a bottle of wine delivered to us.  Here are pictures of that evening!

If I were to now look five years ahead.  The year would be 2015.  I would tell myself to make sure that I enjoy the next five years.  To wake up each morning and say "Today is the day that matters, the day with the greatest potential for accomplishment".  To move forward, challenging myself to live the life I've always dreamed.  There is no other time then now.  

Reflecting on Lessons and Upcoming Goals

My friend and fellow triathlete Beth told me about a cool website called www.reverb10.com. Three women came up with the idea: "Reverb 10 is an annual event and online initiative to reflect on your year and manifest what’s next. Use the end of your year as an opportunity to reflect on what's happened, and to send out reverberations for the year ahead."

They give you a word and prompt for each day in December to reflect on your past year. I'm going to start now. I may combine a few prompts from previous days or I may just do the one of the day. I'm just going to try it out. Below are December 17th and today's prompts.

December 17 – Lesson Learned: What was the best thing you learned about yourself this past year? And how will you apply that lesson going forward? Very good question for me at this time. We learn when we make it through the obstacles and challenges of life, right? Well, I've learned a lot this year! The lesson I've really been reflecting on and applying to my mindset in the final days of this year is what I wrote about in the last post. How I decide to see an event, determines how I proceed forward. Whether I proceed forward in a cloud of self pity or whether I see the event as helping me get closer to my life purpose. Also...that in each moment, event or happening in our life that we have a multitude of options of how we react to that event. For instance, I am at a defining moment in my life. It is sometimes scary, sometimes exciting...sometimes I have days when I question everything and other days that I'm practically floating with enthusiasm. Each of those emotions I experience are a reflection of the choice I made that day. To explain this lesson in a few words is my realization that the ultimate benefit of overcoming the challenges in the pursuit of my goals are not the material rewards but who I have become in the process.

December 18 – Try: What do you want to try next year? Is there something you wanted to try in 2010? What happened when you did / didn’t go for it? I want to write a book in 2011. In 2010, I wanted to get into the habit of writing daily. I did go for it. This blog was my way of jump starting this goal. I did write...maybe not every day, but I definitely wrote a lot! I feel really good about it. I feel it was a great platform to begin 2011 with more purpose in this intention.

I would like my word for this year to be purpose. I want to organize all my activities around my purpose and everything I do be an expression of it.

Your Control in Change

I did a speech in Toastmaster's today about how we only have control over three things in our life.

• the thoughts you think
• the images you visualize
• the actions you take

Most of us live our lives trying to obtain control over the many facets of our life.  The age old nemesis in this balancing act is change.  How can something be our nemesis when it is so dependable?  We can alway count on change!  It is inevitable.  I like to embrace the perspective that change is an opportunity for growth and new experiences.  Instead of seeing change as my nemesis, I can see it as my sidekick in this adventure of my life.  The way I react to my sidekick change is how I control my outcome.  

Of course, it is not always possible to view change as my exciting new buddy in life.  One of the ways I try to maintain this healthy image of change during moments that are difficult is by reading.  The book I am currently re-reading is Jack Canfield's The Success Principles.  There is a simple formula he learned from a psychotherapist that illustrates the control we have in change.  Yes..the control we have in change.

E + R = O

Event + Response = Outcome

For every event we experience in our life, the way we react produces our outcome.  Another way to see this is for every change we experience, the way we react determines our outcome.  For example, my speech was good but it definitely could have been better.  Another speaker asked me last week if I would like to speak in their place.  I said yes, but did not put the speech together until two days before today...when I was presenting.  I relied on my notes which distracted from the speech.  My response to this event is to learn from the feedback I got and make sure I am well prepared for my next speech.  My outcome is after delivering a good speech I have more knowledge on how to make it a phenomenal speech.  I love this.  It is so good to push yourself out of your comfort zones for learning, reaching and attaining.  It's essential to practice in order to become better...which means feeling a little awkward.  It's when you and I take action to become better people and to live a life that we always dreamed and will not regret that we did not take action.  Let's embrace the power that we have the choice to live our ultimate life by how we respond to the events and changes of our life.  

"It's time to start living the life you've imagined."

Henry James

American-born author of 20 novels, 112 stories, and 12 plays

On the cusp

Cusp:  a change that brings opportunities with far-reaching consequences.  

My pursuit in life is to apply my innate gifts and the skills that I have acquired to make mine and other people's lives better.  Making it "better" means through learning, growing and experiencing all that life has to offer.  I have an incredible yearning to inspire those around me to reach for their dreams...what will make them most happy and fulfilled.  I've experienced that as a result of the energy I put into this, I receive so much back...gratitude, fulfillment, love, abundance and the list goes on.  I like to see life as an adventure, my husband calls it Fergitude=the Fergie Attitude. 

My hope is to continue on this adventure mindset to inspire, motivate myself and others to realize their power, purpose and potential.  My purpose is to use my compassion, enthusiasm and creativity to encourage all of us to embrace what makes each of us so unique.  I believe we are all in this together.  Once we all tap into our innate gifts then not only will we better ourselves...we will better the world.  

I want you all to know that I am about "lean into it" (as Jack Canfield says in his Success Principles).  I am willing to explore and enter into the unknown.    I trust that this journey will ultimately take me to where I want to go...and perhaps somewhere better.

   "Anyone who completes this challenge is an achiever, a believer and a non-deceiver." 

-Part of the prayer that was said to all of us before we swam 4 miles across Lake Waccamaw.